


and they were roommates (oh my god, they were roommates)

by InsideMyBrain



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Academy Era, Alternate Universe - Star Trek Fusion, Feelings Realization, Flirting, Hand & Finger Kink, Kevin's Health Problems (tm), M/M, Mind Meld, Pining, Poetry, Roommates, Starfleet Academy, Vulcan Mind Melds, Vulcan!Daniel, Vulcans and Chocolate, brief mention of nausea
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 09:49:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22454932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsideMyBrain/pseuds/InsideMyBrain
Summary: "O Neptune of the blood, O his trident of terrors.O the dark storm-wind from his chest, out of the twisted conch.Hear, how the night becomes thinned-out and hollow. You, stars,is it not from you that the lover’s joy in the beloved’sface rises? Does he not gain his innermost insight,into her face’s purity, from the pure stars?"- Rainer Maria Rilke,Third Duino Elegy
Relationships: Daniel Condren/Kevin O'Reilly
Comments: 11
Kudos: 27





	and they were roommates (oh my god, they were roommates)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many many liberties are taken in this with regards to Vulcan biology and telepathy and general alien biology, so uhh take all that with a grain of salt, lol.
> 
> as you can probably tell by the tags and the rating, this will have smut in the second chapter, so just be aware of that, lol. this chapter is pretty clean, however, except for a brief mention of masturbation. 
> 
> as always! this is a work of fiction and not meant to represent anything going on irl with these lads. please don't send this to Kevin, rt, or anyone affiliated with them! thanks, and enjoy! :)
> 
> EDIT: I will not be posting the second chapter of this. read it as a standalone one-sided pining fic. thanks again.

The day Starfleet Cadet Kevin O'Reilly met his roommate was the first time he ever met a Vulcan, though he didn't realize it at first. 

He was moving his stuff into his dorm, all alone because he was already insecure about joining the Academy at twenty-two and he didn't need his parents there, no matter how much he wanted a familiar face to guide him and an extra pair of hands to help move his things. He hadn't attended any kind of school since sixteen, and that fact combined with the faces of his peers who were mostly a few years younger than him was making his anxiety shoot through the roof. He'd just managed to wrangle the last box through the door and throw it on to his assigned bed, massaging his shoulder from the exertion, when he heard the door open and footsteps fall on the polished wooden floor. 

"Hello?" someone called, the voice male and smooth, with the light tone of the cautiously polite that Kevin recognized from working retail. He turned, plastering a smile on his face, and got his first look at his roommate for first year. 

His roommate was slender and pale - much paler than himself, in fact, which Kevin was surprised at because before this, he had never met a person who was any paler than him. His face was long, with a long nose to match, and large, dark eyes, framed by square glasses. His hair was a messy, curly dark auburn, falling into his eyes. He was dressed in the standard cadet uniform already, his shoulders sharp, and carrying his hat under one arm and a suitcase in the other. Kevin suddenly felt underdressed in his jeans and hoodie. 

"Hi!" Kevin responded, stepping forward to hold out a hand. "I'm Kevin, I guess we're roommates?"

"We are indeed." The ghost of a smile played on his new roommate's lips, but he did not extend his hand to grasp Kevin's in a shake. Instead, he raised his hand beside his face, and parted his middle and ring fingers. 

"Oh!" said Kevin, withdrawing his hand. He put it in the pocket of his hoodie instead. "Are you from Vulcan?" He looked at his roommate's ears, and sure enough, the tips were slightly pointed, and flushed yellow. 

"I am only partially Vulcan, but it's enough that I don't desire hand contact with those I've just met." He paused, then amended, "not to say that I wouldn't ever touch your hand. Just, not in greeting."

"Right." Kevin ruffled his hair. This whole first-meeting was going a lot more awkwardly than he thought it would.

"Sorry, I'm oversharing. I'm Daniel, Daniel Condren," Daniel said.

"Daniel, nice to meet you." Kevin tried to replicate the Vulcan salute, but it hurt his fingers, so he just gave up. "I gotta say, I didn't think Daniel was a very Vulcan name."

Daniel shot him an amused look as he walked further into the dorm. "My middle name is Sokel, if you must know." He swiped some of his hair out of his face, and Kevin saw that his eyebrows were dark and marginally slanted up, his browbones following the angle and making his face look even longer.

Kevin looked away, suddenly feeling like staring at his eyebrows was an invasion. "Cool. Daniel Sokel Condren, good to meet you. Should be cool rooming with you." Then he shut his mouth before he could say any more, internally kicking himself for sounding like an idiot.

Daniel laid his hat on his desk and put his suitcase on his bed, zipping it open. "Agreed."

* * *

Kevin was surprised at the speed at which he and Daniel got close. His only impressions of Vulcans were from a holoseries he watched and the logs he had as readings for his classes, so he thought of them all as uptight and stuffy. Daniel was nothing like that. During the first week, they got drunk together and participated in the Starfleet first-week rituals and hazing that all the other cadets went through, and by the end of orientation week they knew as much about each other as some of Kevin's closest friends from back home did. 

Daniel was only a quarter Vulcan, from his grandmother on his mom's side, but he spent a fair bit of his childhood on Vulcan, going there for holidays and occasional visits. He loved Vulcan philosophy but hated the high council and the Vulcan Science Academy. He loved human art and literature but hated human politics and was suspicious of the Prime Directive. He was in science track for xenopology, the study of alien civilizations and societies, and his big plans for Starfleet were to secure a position on a flagship for exploration. He was two years younger than Kevin, and joined Starfleet after graduating university for English. His shelves were littered with volumes of poetry and novels. His favourite book was Catcher In The Rye. 

Kevin told Daniel all about his numerous health problems, the car accident last year that made him quit his job and re-evaluate his life choices. He told him about his love for antique video games and modern holosuite programs, how he loved the escapism of it. He hoped Starfleet would offer him that escapism, but he wasn't sure how much he liked his chosen track, programming, and thought he might switch to communications if it got too difficult. They bonded over their shared love of dark humour and antique human entertainment. 

They had movie nights and played card games and drinking games, and Kevin found out that cocoa made Daniel's tongue loose like wine did, so he plied him with chocolates and laughed with him until both their stomachs hurt. It's a wonder they ever managed to go to class.

* * *

Kevin was in Intro to Debugging 1001, bored as shit, so he pulled out his comm discreetly under the desk and sent a message to Daniel. 

_What are you up to rn?_

He eyed his professor warily as he awaited Daniel's response. The guy was kind of a dick, and would publicly call out anyone he deemed to not be paying enough attention, ranging from students who fell asleep to those who simply doodled in the margins of their notes. He had to be careful whenever he was goofing off in class, which was quite often.

The comm lit up quietly with Daniel's response.

_Just studying, I have class in a couple hours tho_

Kevin snuck a glance back at the front. The professor was busy making rude remarks towards another poor student who'd had the audacity to ask to record the lecture for accessibility purposes. He looked back at his comm and typed a reply. 

_Meet me in the holosuite? We can play the new Pokemon program?_

Daniel replied almost immediately.

_Hell yeah!_

Kevin grinned at his comm, then stuffed it in his pocket. He gathered up his notes and shoved those into his bag, then stood up.

"And where are you going?" The professor interrupted himself, training his piercing gaze on Kevin. The rest of the lecture, all 100-something students, seemed to turn around and look at him curiously. Kevin felt his throat dry up. "We're waiting, Cadet O'Reilly." The professor crossed his arms. 

Kevin surveyed the students, the professor, everyone waiting with expectant and slightly distasteful faces, and decided,_ fuck it_. He slung his bag over his shoulder, then said, "to the Registrar's office. I'm dropping this course."

"Alright, good luck," he heard the professor say snidely as he turned and walked towards the door, but he wasn't listening anymore. As soon as he opened the door he took off down the hall, a sudden lightness in his step that contradicted the heavy bag on his back. _Fuck programming!_ he thought gleefully as he raced across campus to the Student Centre where the public holosuite was located. _I'm trash at it anyway, and I hate all the profs and other cadets. I'll have better luck in communications._ He ran up to the Student Centre and burst inside, then paused to try and catch his breath.

"Kevin!" Daniel's voice called from across the atrium, and Kevin looked up. He made his way across the bustling centre to stand beside Daniel, who was waiting outside the holosuite.

"How'd you get here so quick?" Kevin asked as he approached. "I ran all the way here from the engineering building."

"I was already here, getting food," Daniel shrugged. "Aren't you supposed to be in class right now?"

Kevin grinned, ruffling his hair. "I am, but I decided I'm dropping out." He laughed at Daniel's shocked expression. "Out of engineering, I mean. I'm gonna switch to communications after all."

"Jesus, you scared me," Daniel sighed. "I was prepared to beg you to stay in Starfleet!"

"Beg, huh?" Kevin wiggled his eyebrows, and Daniel rolled his eyes fondly in response. 

"I mean, it'd be hard to get used to somebody else's nightly routine," Daniel said, deadpan. "It's almost comforting when you get up for water four times in a row, then finally give up and masturbate before passing out." 

"Dan!" Kevin gasped, feeling his face heat up. His roommate's face was totally blank, and it was times like these he couldn't tell whether he was joking or not.

"How would I ever be able to sleep without that?" Daniel continued.

Kevin shoved him lightly. "Alright, you pervert, let's just play some Pokemon."

Daniel's face split into a grin, and Kevin noted, not for the first time, how attractive he was. "I'm just kidding. I don't listen."

"Uh huh. Well if you did, don't act like you wouldn't enjoy it," Kevin joked, then scanned his Student ID card to get access to the holosuite. The doors opened for them, and they stepped inside the dark, empty room. Daniel stepped up to the control panel and started looking through the available programs, the purple light emitting from the control panel illuminating his features. 

_No harm in looking,_ Kevin told himself, not for the first time. _We're roommates. It's not like anything's gonna happen between us._

A beep sounded as Daniel selected the program, then the room shifted, becoming a sunny meadow in the Galar region, with a selection of Pokemon in front of them. Daniel turned to look at them, gasping as his eyes landed on a Wooloo. "I need him!" he said, then ran up to it and started petting its soft fluff. 

Kevin was so engrossed in watching Daniel pet the Wooloo that he didn't even think about which Pokemon he wanted.

* * *

"Hey." 

Kevin watched Daniel glance up from a book, lying on his bed. "Hey," Daniel replied. "What's up?"

Kevin hesitated, then shuffled inside the room. In truth, he'd just had kind of a shit day, but he didn't have anyone to turn to for comfort. Except for Daniel. "What are you reading?" he asked, instead of answering Daniel's question. 

Daniel showed him the cover. _The Duino Elegies, Rainer Maria Rilke,_ it said. "Poetry," Daniel said, at Kevin's quizzical look.

Kevin chuckled. "Are you serious? You really just sit around and read poetry for fun?" 

Daniel laughed too. "I guess it is a little pretentious. But this is my favourite volume of poetry." He patted the bed beside him, and Kevin sat down eagerly, no longer hesitant now that he'd gotten a clear invitation. "This book has a bunch of different Standard translations of his poetry," Daniel said, flipping through the pages, "and the poems in the original Old German at the end, though I can't read those. I just find it so fascinating how different translators have handled his works."

"Really?" Kevin asked. He wasn't interested in the slightest, but the way Daniel's eyes lit up when he talked about it was adorable. 

"Yeah!" Daniel responded. "Like, listen to this. This is the first few lines of the Third Elegy, translated by Gary Miranda." He cleared his throat, then began to recite. 

"It's one thing to write love poems. Another, though, to deal with that river-god of the blood: hidden, guilty. Even the girl, who thinks she knows her young lover, even she isn't close enough for him to tell how this lord of lust - in the lonely times before she knew him, before she eased him, almost before she seemed possible - would lift up his godhead, wet with the unknowable, and churn the night to an endless riot."

Kevin was entranced. The meaning of those words - if, indeed, they had any meaning at all - escaped him, but the enthusiasm in Daniel's face and the way his lips moved around the words, the soft lilt of his voice and the tenderness in his tone, did not. "The first line of the poem is, _it's one thing to write love poems?_ That's kind of cool, actually."

"Yeah!" Daniel beamed, then flipped the page. "But get this - this is how A.S. Kline translates those same lines." He started to read again.

"To sing the beloved is one thing, another, oh, that hidden guilty river-god of the blood. What does he know, himself, of that lord of desire, her young lover, whom she knows distantly, who often out of his solitariness, before the girl soothed him, often, as if she did not exist, held up, dripping, from what unknowable depths, his godhead, oh, rousing the night to an endless uproar?"

"Whoa," Kevin said, impressed. "I'm convinced, that is interesting."

"Right?!" Daniel said excitedly, and it set off something unknowable of Kevin's own, fluttering in his chest. "Language is such, like, an important vessel for culture and traditions, and you can change the whole context of what someone is trying to get across by just changing some of the words a little. This is why I wanna study alien cultures - if we can do this within human culture, think of the possibilities with alien languages and cultures!"

Kevin just smiled. He didn't say, "I would have never thought about it like that. You're incredible."

He didn't say, "You're so cute when you're excited over something you're passionate about. I want to draw that excitement out of you every time we talk."

He didn't say, "I kind of want to cuddle you and have you read poems to me until I fall asleep and forget my shitty day in your warm embrace."

What he really said was, "Okay, I take it back. Reading poetry for fun is slightly less pretentious than I thought. Only slightly, though."

Daniel chuckled fondly. "I'll take it."

* * *

It was 3:04 AM on a school night and Kevin collapsed in front of the toilet in his and Daniel's shared bathroom. 

Despite what he thought when he dropped out of programming, communications was infinitely harder. He was enjoying it a lot more, though, so that was a plus. On the night in question, he had a huge report due the next morning and was two energy drinks into his all-nighter, despite every doctor he'd ever been to advising against consuming excessive amounts of caffeine. He just didn't think there was any other way to get it done. 

He'd gotten up to go to the bathroom because he was feeling nauseous, and one look at the toilet and he was out like a light. 

The next thing he knew, he felt the darkness and the void being sucked out of him, and replaced with a warm golden light that felt like home.

_Am I dying?_ he thought.

_I'm sorry to invade your mind like this,_ a voice came from inside his mind. It sounded familiar. Suspiciously so. _But you said you don't like hospitals, so._

_Daniel?!_ he thought.

_Sh, don't worry,_ Daniel's voice came back to him. _I'm giving you strength so you can wake up quicker._

The golden light was filling him quickly, consolidating and pulsing in a glowing orb somewhere in his chest. It burned like spices did - not that Kevin ate spicy foods that often - but it burned in a good way. _Okay,_ he thought. _I trust you._ He relaxed, and let the light and warmth take over him. 

He wasn't sure how long he was enveloped in that golden light, but it was a while before he felt it start to recede and drain away. As it did, he felt his consciousness return to him, like slowly coming out of a dream, and once it was all gone, he blinked his eyes open blearily. The bathroom light pounded down on him, fluorescent and piercing, and he raised a hand to shield his eyes. 

Kevin sat up, and looked around for Daniel. He realized he was sitting on the counter, breathing heavily. "Dan, are you okay?" he asked cautiously. 

Dan laughed weakly. "Ask yourself that, you're the one who passed out."

"I'm totally fine now," Kevin replied, "thanks to you. What did you do?"

Daniel looked a little sheepish. "I, uh, initiated a mind meld. You passed out and I didn't know what to do besides meld with you or take you to the hospital, and I remembered you said you hate hospitals, so I thought you'd be mad at me if I called you an ambulance. I'm sorry I melded with you without asking first, if you're mad at me anyway I'll totally understand-"

"No, Dan, it's fine," Kevin interrupted. "It really helped. You said it was a mind meld?"

Daniel shrugged. "Yeah, it's a Vulcan telepathic technique. I was taught how to do it as a kid, but I haven't done it in years. Plus, my telepathy is pretty weak, so it wasn't as powerful as a full Vulcan's would be."

"That's fecking awesome," Kevin said, and Daniel laughed. "You gave me the strength to wake up from passing out telepathically? Why didn't you tell me you could do that?"

Daniel rubbed his shoulder. "I didn't think it would ever come up. Besides, I can't really do it to just anyone. I think I was able to do it with you because I know you so well."

"Oh," Kevin said, and looked down at his hands. 

"Yeah," Daniel replied. "You should get some water and get to bed." He hopped off the counter, and held out a hand to Kevin to help him up. 

Kevin glanced at Daniel's hand, then up at his face. "You sure you want me to touch your hand?"

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Kev, I had to touch your face with my hands to meld with you. It's fine."

"Oh. Okay." Kevin reached forward and grasped Daniel's hand, and an electrical current shot through him the moment they touched. Kevin felt himself flush, and he could see by the sudden yellow tone in Daniel's skin that he felt it too. He stumbled to his feet, and Daniel let go of his hand. His fingertips tingled.

"Right, off to bed then," Daniel said, then disappeared from the bathroom. Kevin was left standing alone, wondering what the hell just happened.

* * *

It wasn't long after that that Kevin started getting sudden bursts of emotion. He'd be sitting in class, in a perfectly fine mood, when all of a sudden something small like the sound of people typing all around him would get to him, and he'd be filled with annoyance. Or he'd be standing in line at a coffeeshop, in a sour mood because the line was so long, and he'd notice something like the keychains on the backpack of a person standing in front of him, and he'd be instantly cheered up. Or he'd be studying, completely focused on his homework problems, and his train of thought would be interrupted by a bout of sadness, the urge to cry washing over him. It was weird. 

He went to the school counsellor to ask about what was going on with his emotions, fearing his mental health was getting bad again, but since he wasn't exhibiting any of the other signs of mental illness there wasn't much they could do about it. He was advised to practise mindfulness and cut down on caffeine and alcohol. 

He wondered if mood swings could be a side effect of Daniel's mind meld, so he did some research. A quick Google search told him that emotional transference was a common side effect of a meld, but it only occurred during and immediately after the meld. _A neglectful mind meld,_ the site told him, _could certainly leave lasting impressions of the emotional state of the melder, but it could not create new new feelings in the recipient, especially over 72 hours after the mind connection was severed._ Kevin decided that couldn't be it. Besides, Daniel's mental state was totally calm during their meld. That couldn't explain the anger, the fear, the sadness, all the negative emotions he'd been suddenly feeling lately. 

He could deal with it, of course. It was just weird.

* * *

Kevin and Daniel were just chilling in their dorm one evening when Kevin looked over at his roommate and thought, _I think I love him_. He was lying in bed on his PADD, frowning and swiping every few seconds, and his soft fluffy hair was falling into his eyes, so he had to brush it away every few seconds. Kevin himself was on his own bed, messing around with an antique video game console, and at that moment he was struck by the domesticity of the scene. Each doing their own thing, but together. Cozy. 

The thought scared him, and he dropped the console on to his lap. Daniel looked up, concern in his face. "You good?"

Kevin looked at him, and something molten gold-coloured flared in his mind when they locked eyes. He didn't know how he knew the colour of it, or why he knew it was connected to his feelings for Daniel. He just did. "Yeah, I'm fine." He tried to smile, with questionable success. 

Daniel smiled softly back. "Okay." He returned his gaze to the PADD, and Kevin returned his own gaze to the console in his lap, but he didn't pick it up again. 

_Where did that thought come from?_

Images answered his question, automatically, unbidden. He and Daniel laughing together, drunk and making fun of others at a stupid frat party, playing in the holosuite, Kevin resting his head on Daniel's shoulder while he was making tea in the morning, arguing over who got to use the shower first, flashes of bare, pale skin caught between furniture, the tingling sensation in his fingertips when Daniel helped him stand in the bathroom that night. The tingling sensation has returned many times since, and it was returning now, as he thought about it. He didn't know what it meant, but he knew, in the same way he knew about the molten gold flare, that it was connected to his feelings for Daniel. 

_God damn it,_ he thought. _I can't believe I let myself fall for my roommate._


End file.
